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Saturday, November 7, 2009

Do I know you?

Okay, here are the nuts and bolts of what I have been feeling.

Lately when I look into the mirror I just don't recognize myself. I don't identify with who I see in my reflection. It's me but I have changed so much. It's not just who I am that I love…but horribly it's my figure.
This sounds lame of me but I miss what I looked like just a short five years ago. I was a pretty hot chicky. Now well.... In less than five years I got engaged, married pregnant and had three children. Five years ago January 15th I wore a size 4 wedding dress and walked down the aisle. Now I wear a .... much larger size.


It's weird though. My mind doesn't totally know this. I still pick up clothes to try on that are many sizes too small for me. I still have the clothes in my closet that I probably will never ever wear again. I keep them, in hopes that I will again. Is it wrong? Wrong to want my figure back. It's a frustrating fact that I look into the mirror think I look okay then later am reminded on just how large I really a now by a picture. It's funny because when I took that picture I thought I was looking pretty good. It's said that in a picture you gain 10lbs... for me it's more like 30.  So let’s do the math.... I am 5feet 7 inches. When I was wed I weighed 125... I now weigh 160. Then I wore a size 4-6 now 12-14. I know size is only a number but I have to say I cannot stand this number. This is not me. I know that with kids you change and gain and keep supposable 5 pounds with each kid. So that for me is 15 pounds of un-removable weight!!! So... where the hell did the extra 20 come from???
So here is my goal. Not an unreachable goal. Nothing ridiculous, nothing unattainable. By my Birthday May 14th 2010 I'll be 36 and I want to be back down to 135 and a size 8.
That is do able :o)

The race is on. I just have to make it through 4 family Birthday parties, Thanksgiving & Christmas without packing on the bulge.
I can do it!!!! So here I go... Wish me luck!


2 comments:

  1. omg, its so funny you say this because i am in the same boat. i got married 3 years ago and now have 3 kids..and a whole lotta weight too! my sister-in-law is getting married next summer and i HAVE to be a size 6...cuz i said so! haha. good luck and keep us all posted on your success!!
    xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  2. I am 5'7". When I got married I had your same stats. 2 years into our marriage, I had 2 babies in 1 1/2 years and packed on the pounds. I am 42 now and have a 14 yr. old and an almost 13 year old. I haven't lost the weight...some of it, but not all. I am a size 8, but not a 4 anymore. I do long for a size 4, I must say...
    You can do this - your kids are small yet. It gets harder the longer you wait. I totally feel your pain. I could have written your post. Honestly. I wish you all the luck in the world. You CAN do this! This is so doable! Don't put it off, though.
    You know what works? Weight Watchers...you can do it on-line, you know...try it for two months, just through the holidays and see if it's not working for you...blog about it.

    ReplyDelete

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