****This post is revisited due to too early of posting ****
If the question were what is a Mother that would be an easy one. I had one a great one. I am one, hopefully a good one.
But this is not the question at hand. Growing up that was a good question, one I didn’t have the answer to. Don’t get me wrong, I had one. I knew him but he wasn’t a good one. I guess as a child I didn’t know any better. But when we left or more like fled.
I don’t think he wanted to be a Father. You don’t act and do things that he did if that weren’t true.
He did however collectively with my Mother do three very great things… Andy, Christa and Julie. I will give him that.
I did have Father figures in my life growing up though.
My Grandfather was always there. Showing me love and encouragement. He was responsible for the cultivation of my love for art. I thank him, Love him and most of all Miss him. Paul Grady Sanders was a mans man. Old fashion strong and the center of his world was his Wife and children.
But it wasn’t till I was 18 that I met my Father. Michael Edward Ferguson, the man that I call Daddy O’.
I love him respect him and have been honored by our ever growing relationship. It wasn’t always this way. In the beginning we.. didn’t get along so well. I was horribly protective of my mother and wasn’t going to let just anyone around. Like it was my choice ha ha ha. But as the years passed I let my guard down. I can’t tell you the exact moment he became my Dad, but I can tell you it was around the time of the passing of his cousin Stevie. It was then that I saw him. Why then I have not the foggiest idea. But after that I found myself drawn to him.
Now I can tell you when people see us they think he is my biological Father. Do I correct them? No.
Blood isn’t everything. It’s not even really something. When it comes to Love and Family it’s about what you invest. This man who hadn’t ever had his own children became a Father then became a Grandfather through it. He has fully embraced this role. He adopted us and I did the same right back. He is amazing and I love that he lets me love him. I love that he loves my Husband and his Grand boys the way he does. And to me most importantly the way he loves my Mom. The way I always wanted and dreamt about.
These two examples set me up for my final example. My sweet dear loving Husband.
Watching him become a Father has made my heart sing. Watching a man who before was just that become a Husband then a Father. That pride in his eye and over filling love in his heart. The way he plays with them, is there when they get hurt or in trouble. Watching him walk with a sleeping baby. That is true strength. From the moment he laid hands on his children it was perfect for him. This is what he was born for. This man was meant to be a Father.
I have fallen in love with him over and over though it.
He, like my Grandfather and Father cut from the same cloth.
They say you Marry a man that most resembles your Father… I can proudly say I did.
So to answer the question… What is a Father?
A man who with all of his heart and soul wants love nurtures another as his own.
In short:
The Man who truly wants’ to be.
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